Tuesday, December 2, 2014

The Hunger


My recent exam results have made one thing abundantly clear, I need to get to the top. This is definitely no easy feat, only one person out of a hundred-and-twenty can obtain this dream of being the top. The feeling you get when you beat more than twenty people is amazing, put it in this selfish way,  other people have invested time and you have triumphed to prize something that they desire.

Always Down Below

It is so conspicuous to not only myself but also to my maths teacher, I am just not cutting it, being down at the bottom of the barrel is a crushing feeling. The feeling of last place is something I have vivid memories about. The reminiscent feeling of when everyone gets their test marks back and mine is the lowest, questions coupled with undermining starts taking place and mild paranoia occurs. Sure, there are at least a handful of students who disdain the worth of getting good grades in school however even they would feel at least a tiny bit of dismay when receiving news that they are the lowest.

My Story

 Honestly, if you guys haven't already figured out, I am very very competitive. Losing to me is like taking a bullet to the chest, the pain is unbearable. So in class we get our results back, one of the most excruciating,agonizing ways to return test marks is one by one, highest to lowest. The premonition of being one of the last marks called is just crushing.

Next Blog

My next blog is going to be about something that has been bothering me for a long time now, really need to get this off my chair. The mental scars are still open and the wound is still fresh ,constantly licked but to no avail.

Thank you guys for reading this short catch-up and I will see you guys very very soon!